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<\/p>\nGRIEF has no guidebook or rules, though one might try everything they can to find answers.<\/p>\n
At Christmas, grief can be particularly hard as nostalgia for old times lingers. <\/p>\n
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The lead-up to Christmas can be full of dread as you fear how you will feel on the big day; Will you be able to carry on with normal traditions? Will you cry non-stop? Is it bad to still feel excited? <\/p>\n
During Grief Awareness Week, Dipti Tait, therapist and author of Planet Grief, says there\u2019s no one-size-fits-all when it comes to grief and reactions will vary. <\/p>\n
She says: \u201cGrief is a complex and individualised normal response to loss, it feels like a turbulent cocktail of emotions.\u00a0<\/p>\n
\u201cContrary to popular belief, grief is not confined to the death of a loved one.<\/p>\n
\u201cIn fact, it extends out to various life changes including things like relationship breakdowns.\u201d<\/p>\n People often talk about the stages of grief; shock and denial, pain and guilt, anger and bargaining, depression, upward turn, reconstruction, and acceptance and hope.<\/p>\n Realistically, things aren\u2019t so linear. Feelings and states come and go, potentially over a lifetime.<\/p>\n Dipti shares what to expect with grief, how to cope with it, and how to help others.<\/p>\n <\/span><\/p>\n <\/span><\/p>\n <\/span><\/p>\n <\/span><\/p>\n You may experience a number of symptoms when missing a loved one. Dipti says these include: <\/p>\n Dipti says: "Recognise grief has no linear path, all kinds of emotions are thrown up so don\u2019t try and fight them.<\/p>\n "Create a daily routine to provide a sense of structure and stability. That can be as simple as showering in the morning and making your bed.<\/p>\n "Prioritise self-care activities, including exercise, positive interaction, proper nutrition, and sufficient rest.<\/p>\n "Share your feelings with trusted friends, family, or a support group \u2013 online support groups can offer just as much help as ones you attend physically too.<\/p>\n "Consider professional help such as grief therapy sessions, or read books to help for additional support."<\/p>\n Perhaps you have a close friend or relative that is grieving the loss of someone.<\/p>\n Dipti says: "Offer a listening ear without judgment, allowing the grieving person to express their emotions.<\/p>\n "Provide practical support by assisting with daily tasks, meals, or childcare to alleviate some burdens.<\/p>\n "Grieving is a unique process; be patient and allow the person the time they need."<\/p>\n Be careful not to minimise someone's experience, Dipti sas. <\/p>\n "Validate the grieving person's emotions and avoid minimising their experience. It\u2019s their experience to endure, not yours."<\/p>\n She also warns to never say things like:<\/p>\n Dipti says that with children experiencing bereavement, "use age-appropriate language to explain the concept of loss".<\/p>\n She says: "Provide a sense of routine and stability. Offer creative outlets for expression, such as drawing or storytelling."<\/p>\n With parents or friends, offer practical help such as taking on tasks, like laundry, cooking, or other admin that has fallen behind.<\/p>\n For parents, "allow them to express their emotions without judgment," says Dipti. "Suggest professional support if needed."<\/p>\n With friends, she advises: "Be a good listener. Check-in regularly, even as time passes, as grief doesn't have a fixed timeline. <\/p>\n "Respect their need for alone time but also offer companionship."<\/p>\n It can be difficult to know what to say when someone in the office is grieving.<\/p>\n "Show empathy and understanding in the workplace," Dipti says. <\/p>\n "Be flexible and considerate of their needs. Offer assistance with work tasks if appropriate."<\/p>\n Grief at Christmas can be a whole 'nother ball game.<\/p>\n Sue Ryder, bereavement charity, says think about who you want to spend Christmas with, and how 'normal' you want it to be.<\/p>\n The website says: "You shouldn't feel pressured to have Christmas as usual if it doesn't feel right, although celebrating as you normally would might be a comfort to you.<\/p>\n "This will be different for each person after a bereavement, so plan for a Christmas you feel comfortable with and give yourself permission to do what you want to do."<\/p>\n The charity also says that all emotions are normal to come flooding in and may take up energy.<\/p>\n "Tears are an important and, for some, necessary part of grief," it says.<\/p>\n "As much as you may fear that you won't stop crying once you start – you will, and you may even feel a little better for doing so."<\/p>\n For those having their first Christmas without someone they miss, Sue Ryder says: "It\u2019s important to try not to put too much pressure on yourself and those around you, particularly as how you\u2019re feeling might change from day-to-day.<\/p>\n![](\"https:\/\/www.thesun.co.uk\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/12\/TM-comp-Deborah-James-v1-1-1.jpg\")
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