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Troubled reality star Paddy Doherty has told how he made a suicide attempt by throwing himself in front of a car.
A decade on from being crowned the winner of Celebrity Big Brother, he has opened up about his years of hell.
He said he has battled back after getting hooked on cocaine and suffering from depression.
But the Big Fat Gypsy Wedding star revealed he is in a better place now thanks to years of help from his psychiatrist.
He said: "It was about two o’clock in the morning, it was a cold, dark night and I went outside, walked to the main road, not far from my house at all. I wasn’t even thinking straight.
"I waited and watched, then I saw the headlights and a car driving towards me. When it was close enough, I just jumped, threw myself in front of the car.
"The nearside of the car hit me and I flew into the air and bounced back onto the kerb.
"The poor driver slammed on his brakes and jumped out of his car, frightened to death, apologising profusely and asking if I was all right.
"He was really shaken up and he wanted to call the police and an ambulance and he just kept on apologising.
"I said, ‘No, no, just leave me alone. It’s okay I’m fine, I’m fine, I’m really sorry!’ I picked myself up from the ground and walked away with blood dripping from my head."
It was at that point Paddy said he made a promise to himself not to attempt suicide again and looking back he realises now that he was depressed at the time.
In his new book, Paddy Doherty: My Own Words, the 62-year-old said that since taking medication he has "more good days than bad days."
He said: "Thankfully, I am seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, finally, and I am coming out of the depression and anxiety now.
"Having gone through such turmoil myself and seeing people like Tyson Fury, who is such a great, tough man amongst the Traveller community, seeing that he was able to open up and share his own battles with problems like these, fills me with pride and deep respect for him.
"Once you get this problem you never escape from it, I am not ashamed to say that I take a tablet every day of my life.
"I can talk normal, see people normal, go for a drink and chat normal, have a laugh and a joke. It helps just enough to stop me thinking about the bad things inside my head."
If you need someone to talk to call Samaritans on 116 123 or email [email protected]
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- Big Brother
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