Matchmaker Maria Avgitidis reveals her '12 date rule'

Matchmaker Maria Avgitidis reveals her '12 date rule'

Matchmaker reveals her ’12 date rule’ to know if they are ‘the one’ – and EXACLY how to tell a date you want to wait to have sex for the first time

  • Matchmaker Maria Avgitidis has shared her ’12 date rule’ for singles 
  • The podcast host said the key is to get to know someone before having sex 
  • Sex releases oxytocin in the body and makes it harder to notice any red flags 
  • When dating aim to learn four specific things about the person and they’re traits 
  • Maria also explained how to tell the other person you don’t want to have sex yet  

A matchmaker has revealed her ’12 date rule’ to help singles find their perfect match.

Maria Avgitidis, from the US, said the key is to get to know someone before having sex to understand if you ‘truly like them or not’.

‘When we have sex we have a heavy dose of oxytocin (known as the “love drug”) go through our bodies. Suddenly we’re wearing rose coloured glasses, so not only the red flags are hard to see but the pink flags are just invisible,’ Maria said on the Finding Mr Height podcast.

‘What the 12-date rule does is it takes a step back and you’re intentionally getting to know someone to determine if you actually like this person.’

And the rule doesn’t require going on 12 physical dates – it could simple be a 20-minute phone or video call, but excludes texting. 

Matchmaker Maria Avgitidis (pictured) said when dating the key is to get to know someone before having sex to understand if you truly like them or not

The 12 date rule doesn’t require going on 12 physical dates – it could simple be a 20-minute phone or video call, but excludes texting (stock image) 

‘A date is anything that is a phone call, a video call or an in-person date that’s more than 20 minutes and up to three hours,’ Maria said, adding how you can have up to two dates in one day based on this rule.

‘Let’s say you have two one-hour Facetime with them, that’s two dates,’ she continued.

‘Then you go on an eight-hour Sunday all-day date, that’s still two dates, because you max at two dates in one day.’

1. What are they like on a good day?

2. What are they like on a bad day

3. How do they react when I’m having a bad day?

4. How are they like then I’m having a good day?

Maria also said ‘texting doesn’t account for anything’ because you still don’t know what the other person is like.

‘You haven’t been on a single date with them, how do you even know if you like this person?’ she asked.

During the 12 dates, aim to learn four essential factors about the other person – including what they’re like on both a good and bad day and how they react when you’re having a good or bad day.

During this process singles will likely find they won’t pass the second or third date after learning more about the other person.

Maria said the ‘most important thing’ to learn about the other person is how they react when you’re having a good day, such as if you get a promotion or when you go to lunch with friends.

‘You can learn a lot about someone in the 12-date rule,’ she said, adding how this process can only take two weeks rather than three months.

Maria also said ‘texting doesn’t account for anything’ because you still don’t know what the other person is like (stock image) 

What does the 12 date rule involve?

The 12 date rule allows singles to get to know the person their dating and their behaviours 

By withstanding from sex, you’re able to view the person and notice any red flags 

The 12 date rule doesn’t require going on 12 physical dates – it could simple be a 20-minute phone or video call, but excludes texting

The process can only take two to three weeks rather than months 

Be open to the person you’re dating if you don’t want to have sex with them just yet and the reason why  

While on the dates, Maria encouraged singles to speak to the person they’re dating about waiting to have sex until you feel comfortable. 

‘You should say, “I really like you but I’d like to wait to have sex and I need you to know three things”.’

Maria said to tell the person you’re dating how much you like them and say ‘you’re great in bed’, even if you need to tell a cheeky lie.

Next, let them know you’ll inform them the moment you’re ready to have sex.

‘Saying those three things to a straight man, it immediately covers the bases of what he thought initially when you told him you don’t want to have sex,’ Maria said, meaning it eliminates any doubt.

Maria also said you’re not ‘doomed’ if you sleep together before the final date.

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